a certain ratio

Write About Love

2010-10-23T07:57:00.002+08:00

I cannot die before Stuart Murdoch.
I want to hear all the melodies in his head.

Live Performances in Singapore

2010-09-19T22:58:00.000+08:00

Mark Kozelek (Red House Painters, Sun Kil Moon) 29th Sept 10
Vampire Weekend 26th Oct 10
Flaming Lips 11th Nov 10

Hail the indie bands and welcome empty wallet!

Re-opening

2010-09-19T17:36:00.001+08:00

I have been trying to fix up the blog with new design and gadgets.
Looking good and all will be ready probably by next week.
Do come back.

Type Writer Gig

2010-09-16T13:39:00.000+08:00

Beautiful knows!

2010-09-16T00:22:00.000+08:00

My beautiful knows me more than anyone else
My beautiful keeps me sane, when I'm in my hell
My beautiful knows me, nobody else
My beautiful loves me, more than myself!

Thanks my beautiful!

A taste of things to come

2010-09-14T00:59:00.000+08:00

Watch this space. I am back.

Rise again!

2008-01-04T17:40:00.000+08:00

It will be a happy new year.

Gravity

2007-11-17T12:06:00.000+08:00

The slim got fat, the fat got fatter, the ugly got uglier.
Aging, what a bitch.

Right thing to do

2007-11-13T14:32:00.000+08:00

Doing the right thing gives you the moral upper hand.

The need to Coach

2007-11-12T12:13:00.000+08:00

Yet another one leaving the company. This time someone close to my heart. Brilliant finance manager with a heart of gold and mind you, that hardly comes together in a package.

Attrition is required in a company, especially one that promotes from within. However, when attrition rate increases faster than the rate of producing talents to perform the job- issue arises. The organization will be largely staffed with young, passionate, career driven leaders, that may not have the necessary skill to fill the shoes, and even if they did- their interest may not be in developing the next batch of people succeeding them. They will have limited energy, given that they are inexperienced, they will be focusing on results which will ultimately be the key driver for them to bring their careers to greater heights. Ultimately, if the company is unable to meet their demands on their career or pay, they simply opt out and with the skills that they have acquired; they can easily get a job in another great company. And with that – a void is left behind in the organization.

The key to resolve this is coaching. The most over-used and under-executed word in the office. Ensure that this is systematically measured as a performance indicator and the gap can be closed.

It’s better to burn out than to fade away. Coaching will be your legacy.

The Stupidity continues

2007-11-11T22:33:00.000+08:00

Hi everyone,

I don't know whether you realised but we are behind schedule. So far, what is certain is the food and the mob briefing. We had a few reponses so far but insufficient to make a decision. If we decide to go for activities, I think that we must meet to discuss the planning and coordination not to mention prizes. If we want a talk, who's gonna be the speaker? If we just want a dinner cum conversation, we may not need to meet. I will be away from 26th Nov to 1st Dec for a conference in HK, so if we meet, it has to be soon.Please send in your responses, opinions, suggestions etc by 2359 11th Sunday. H, please help to do the collation and make the final decision.

Best regards,

Major A

4 months

2007-11-11T22:32:00.001+08:00

和你在一起是我每一天最重要的小事.
谢谢你陪我度过我最开心的四个月.

Skill set

2007-11-08T22:39:00.001+08:00

The skill needed for investment is not a forecast of what will actually happen to the market, but a prediction of how people will respond to the market.

Interpretive

2007-11-08T11:23:00.000+08:00

Enjoy.

Woes of a Misguided Semantic

2007-11-04T13:41:00.000+08:00

The concept of annual leave is just passe in this era.

The original idea of leave is for the worker to have a rest and not be involved in the transactional tasks for that period. This will translate to a reduced amount of output for the company. Trade off is deemed necessary for the company as ample breaks between day to day job is identified to make the employee happier at work and thus making him more productive and overall lowering the attrition rate. Obviously the net benefit of granting an employee leave is much more positive than making him work everyday.

In the modern day, output of a company cannot be reduced as employees go on leave. Demand does not dip just because Christmas is round the corner and outputs must be consistent to ensure that the supply is constant. So if someone goes on leave, the easiest thing for a company to ensure that output remains constant is to have someone else cover the job of the person going on leave. What's worse in the recent years-with mechanization and automation replacing human labour-job profiles are moving from transactional roles to planning roles. Planning roles are not as time sensitive as transactional ones. If you are going on leave, the work will wait for you to come back and not forgetting that overall outputs cannot be decreased, more plans and projects will pile up over the period that you are gone. Net, if you are taking leave, you are either screwing your colleagues by giving them more work, or screwing yourself, cos you have now less time to finish up your work.

Taking leave is no longer a tool for work life balance. It's more like delayed hardship.

But heck it anyway. Had a great day on Friday when I did not have to work or think about it. Let's worry about it when I replicate my e mail later this evening.

You got to wear your Jeans!

2007-11-02T09:49:00.000+08:00

Finally decided to season my dry Nudies the right rock-&-roll way. Watch the pong!

The Swedes know it better

2007-10-29T07:58:00.000+08:00

Six years ago Maria Erixon Levin moved home from her top job as Director of Design at Lee in Brussels to start her own. That was the beginning of the fairy tale Nudie, that has grown into a million dollar industry. It is not until now that they open their own store (in Stockholm).

"Buyers and retailers choose what they want to sell. By having our own store we will be able to show the whole collection and establish a relationship with the customer at our own pace. The interior of our store will more look like you are at the pub than in a store. We think that environment is more jeans friendly, says Maria."

Your operations is in Göteborg, why do you open your store in Stockholm?

"This will be like our second home. Our agents are based in Stockholm and we will combine it with our showroom behind the store. Söder is a lovely area, where we feel at home. It is nice to avoid being on the typical shopping streets. The environment should allow customers to spend hours trying on a pair of jeans. They are welcome to just come and hang out."

The success has placed Maria on the list of Sweden's hottest entrepreneurs and the title of "fashion queen of the west". She is very thankful for the title but does not at all relate to it. Maria does what she does because she loves jeans and not because she wants to create fashion. She sees herself more like an industrial designer than a creator of fashion.

You're not interested in fashion?

"I overdosed on fashion at my previous job. The last few years I have had a sort of 'zero tolerance inspiration' as I have not traveled nor read any fashion magazines. Fashion is short term and anxious. If you ignore what other people do you will have a much broader area to get inspired."

You have also chosen not to advertise your products?

"If I buy a magazine I have to turn at least to page 10 until I get to what I want to read. That is not the kind of relation I want to have with our customers. If everyone in a band is on stage dressed in your clothes the trust will disappear. I believe in the 'jungle drum', if people like what they find they will tell their friends."

Are you saying that Swedes have a special relationship to jeans?

"It has to do with 'folkhemmet'. Everyone should be equally different. Here you see all levels of society wearing jeans: bankers, lawyers, etc. You don't see that abroad."

You recently launched a "green" collection and have a partnership with Amnesty and Barncancerfonden (Childrens Cancer Fund). Where do you find the commitment?

"It's all about a personal commitment for us who run the company. For us, Nudie can be a big launching pad where we communicate with a large audience. It's all about doing what you can. We might not be able to make a big difference but everyone can do their part."

Check out Nudie at http://www.nudiejeans.com/.

No wonder the Swedes do it better.

Yes Sir!

2007-10-28T23:19:00.000+08:00

And the planning for the barbeque goes on after 2 weeks and hundreds of mails.

The commanding officer speaketh:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hi J,
Looks like we have no choice but to stick to Proposal 2 due to the time factor. Let's leave it to tomorrow to get more suggestions. Btw, I think that it easier to get vouchers (NTUC, Watsons...) rather than buying stuff which we have to wrap, carry and draw lots.

H,
Need your help to collate the suggestions after 2359 tomorrow and come up with a list for polling. Once we have decided on the activities, crafting the programme should be easy.

Some of you have not been responding at all. This event is to be PLANNED by us all not just a few. Whatever is decided you will have to play a part whether it's the preparation or the coordination on the day itself. Division will only take care of the briefing. So have your say or decide wisely when the polling begins.

Regards,
Maj A
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What the fuck do you know about planning and in this case, specifically, decision making? Having such democracy does not necessarily translate to happiness, prosperity and progress for our Nation.

Hail to the King of Fools.

Grass is obviously greener on the other side

2007-10-26T14:07:00.000+08:00

I am officially jealous.

Received a mail from my ex college mate and she is now an executive director at Goldman Sachs.

I need to do better.

Productivity

2007-10-24T09:31:00.000+08:00

How many reservist officers does it take to plan a barbeque for the men?
20 officers, 50 e mails and they are now asking for the RSM and CSMs to join in the discussion loop.

And interestingly, the budget is only $9 per head.

How many people in my office does it take to plan for a barbeque?
1 enterprising Vietnamese lady.

I worry for the country when the office lady is more efficient than our firefighters.

On Your Own

2007-10-23T13:04:00.000+08:00

I don't think anybody actually sits down with entrepreneurs to tell them how to run a business. Have the confidence in getting the blue vase youself, and do it at all costs.

Maybe we are taught our whole academic lives what to do next.

Band of the moment

2007-10-22T23:39:00.000+08:00

Akron/Family kicks ass real bad. Part cacophony, part paganistic, part pastoral, part groovy, part whispery, part freak folky, part psychedelic. No, never watched them live, but I sure wish to.

Check them out.

Amazing shit.

New Feature

2007-10-21T04:40:00.001+08:00

Look out for the new music player on the right of the blog panel. Plays the best music in my current music collection or soundtracks my current mood. This will be updated as and when I have new music.

Amazing stuff on an amazing technology enabler.

R.I.P.

2007-10-21T04:25:00.000+08:00

It's been a long two years since its inception. It's been a long dark two years. Thank you for walking side by side with me all these while.

The past does not get buried, but the future begins with a new face-lift.

Hope you enjoy the new look.

Changing Retail Climate

2007-10-19T11:36:00.000+08:00

Why are we not selling as much?

It’s not about the television copy.
It’s not about the displays.
It’s not about competition.
It’s not about the parallel imports.
It’s the product.

We are living in an age where information is readily accessible.
And consumers have a large variety of choices.
They know what is marketing and how much they can believe in the claims.
How they feel is no longer what we tell them to.

We need a killer product that really delivers what consumers want.

State that I am in

2007-10-19T01:13:00.000+08:00

I am happy. :)

How to Spot a Fake Rolex Submariner

2007-10-16T23:39:00.000+08:00

1. Cyclops Magnification Bubble – The crystal on authentic Rolex watches features a “Cyclops bubble” that offers 2.5 times magnification of the date. On fake Rolex watches, this bubble is often off-center or made of glass, and usually approaches only 1.5 times the magnification.

2. Micro-etched Crystal – Many fakes will try to match the micro-etched Rolex logo that has become standard on genuine watches made after 2002. Rolex began micro-etching their coronet symbol into the crystal just below the 6 o’clock position. The mark is so small, it is often difficult to see with the naked eye, but can be identified under magnification. The detail is so precise that counterfeit models often cannot replicate the logo accurately.

3. Hologram Sticker – Some forgeries will attempt to re-create the hologram sticker that comes on all Rolex case backs. The sticker features a hologram of the Rolex Crown positioned just above the case reference number. Most forgeries are not hologram stickers at all, but simply patterns that do not change when viewed from different angles.

4. Triplock Crown Seal – The Submariner features an extra seal between the winding tube’s threads. Many replicas will completely leave this feature off or possess a fake seal that serves no practical purpose.

5. Size and Weight – although it is not the most scientific method for determining a fake, it should be noted that authentic Rolex watches are very sturdy and therefore relatively heavy. Fake watches are made from cheaper materials and typically feel very light. Also, the bands on genuine Rolex watches are full whereas fakes often display hollow links.

6. Hand Movement – The second hand on a genuine Rolex watch features a smooth and continuous movement that often cannot be duplicated by fake watches. Their movements are often in small, jerky increments.

7. Sapphire Composition –Many faux-Rolexes will use regular glass instead of true sapphire crystal. A good test of the materials is to check the water surface tension. A smeared film of water will pull together on sapphire due to the extremely smooth surface.

8. Lettering – Under high-magnification, the type should reveal clean edges not found in many forgeries.

9. Case Reference Numbers – The serial and case reference numbers can be found in between the lugs on the side of the case. Authentic Rolex numbers are engraved with great detail and are very smooth. The numbers on fake watches often look “sand-blasted” or are roughly etched into the case.

10. Check with me - Because I just bought a Class A replica that beats half of these tests.

And How Did I Not Know?

2007-10-16T00:48:00.001+08:00

At the department of forgotten shows. Someone kill me, please.

Back to School

2007-10-15T22:09:00.000+08:00

More treading down memory lane today, when I went back to the University to request for a copy of my transcript to prepare for my entrance into the guild-hood of Chartered Accountants.

Memory lane started with the University Cultural Center greeting me. In front of it is the Conservatory of Music which did not exist during my time, but now sits right in front of the University's facade. The 2 buildings have a similar architecture to them, but those are the only 2 buildings with any similar architecture at all. The backdrop which consists of Raffles Hall (imagine a 30 year old army barracks), an extension block (imagine a HDB point block about 15 floors high), and the Engineering Faculty (imagine THE Engineering Faculty) stuck out like sore thumbs. No consistency, no common aesthetics. Memory lane began to feel like the yellow brick road- I will need a pair of green glasses to make everything look like they belong together.

The problem is this. The University was designed and function-built as a whole campus before, and it had a consistent master plan to it. However as years go by, the development of the University probably got de-centralized to different faculties and organizations. I presume they independently worked on their own development needs and started building the extensions without consulting a main body, and thus resulting to this mess of a place.

The Students' Affairs Office where I am supposed to collect the transcript is at Yusof Ishak Hall. The building did not change much, its still the same small white tiles that covered the walls, and the layout of the place is still the same. However you cannot help but notice certain obvious cosmetic changes to update the place. The University's idea of upgrading seemed to be labeling all the rooms with large san-serif fonts, changing all the doors and furniture and calling it renovated. It's like adding a spoiler to the Hyundai Getz and trying to pass it of as a sports car. This certain method of redecoration is found throughout the school all the way to the Arts canteen. Distasteful.

The Arts canteen is a pleasant surprise. It is completely renovated with a lot more open space, and a lot brighter than what it was before. I went straight to the Western food stall, which was my then favorite and ordered a grilled fish set which cost $2.20. Wow. Value for money. Took a bite into it, and I was sure the owners have changed. They used whipped potato sauce to garnish my fish. I am a strong believer of cost synergy, but this is really taking it up to a new level. Nevertheless, business flourishes for them. Un-ending queue.

The poor taste is not only reflected in the undergrad's choice of food. Everyone seems to love to dress shabbily. You will think that natural selection should create a better looking next generation and the general increase of disposable income of Singaporeans will lead to better grooming- but you are wrong. They look and dress exactly like what I remembered them to be during my times. No campus superstar here.

Decided to pay my Alma Mata a visit after swallowing lunch. The Engineering faculty did not look very much different from the time I graduated. The only difference is that I noticed that the Engineers are no longer Singaporeans but Chinese from Mainland China and Indians from India. So where did all the Singaporeans go?

Aside from all these differences, a sense of familiarity and nostalgia flooded me. The same beautiful view to the open sea with the oil refineries is still there. The same view that inspired me. The same footpath I took to school daily. The same slope I jogged up. The same classrooms where I copied tutorials. The same LT where I watched the play. The same place where I held the ex's hand. The same hall where I shared my life with her for 4 years. The same tree and the same sky.

I don't wish to turn back the clock because I know I cannot. All I know right now is to live my life forward correct, so that when I look back next time, nostalgia will not be filled with shame and regret but with pride and joy.

You are my second chance. I will get it right.

I like and I don't care if you don't

2007-10-15T02:27:00.000+08:00

A 10th anniversary special.

I never liked blogging about bands I like, cos its too insipid and rather pointless, and I am not about to shove my opinions down the throats of the uninitiated. Furthermore, it's probably a list I will amend almost on a everyday basis, I can never nail down which are the bands I like better. It all depends on the time and flavour of the day.

Am writing it down anyway. It's afterall 10 long years. Indulge me.

Top 10 bands (in no order of merit) that I currently think are rather awesome:

1 Animal Collective
2 Black Kids
3 Devandra Banhart
4 King Creosote
5 Iron and Wine
6 Jens Lekman
7 A Place to Bury Strangers
8 Tuung
9 Sunset Rubdown
10 Pinback

A Short History of Music

2007-10-15T01:11:00.000+08:00

The Gene album 'Olympian' was passed on to me in October 1997. My first indie (short for independently-released for the extremely uninitiated. It's got nothing to do with Indians) album. It first began with Brit-pop. Next, it was everything that Brit pop referenced to.

Music gripped me in an obsessive way, first buying up everything that is in that genre, and subsequently buying the entire back catalog of bands that I enjoyed and admired from that genre. I turned out to be quite a groupie as well. Wrote to Neil Hannon and Alex Morris online, and was completely overwhelmed when they responded to me. I scoured every issue of Q and treated the critics with divine reverence and anybody else's opinion which was different to theirs was automatically condemned to poor taste and lack of exposure to the right music. Through NME.com, I was informed of when Noel Gallagher was moving house and how many times James Dean Bradfield used the porta-loo at Glastonbury.

The ultimate pilgrimage was to the States to catch the Coachella Music Festival. But due to the poor planning, we did not manage to catch the would-have-been-dazzling show in the desert. Instead we caught some second rated acts (Mull Historical Society instead of the White Stripes that were just performing a couple of blocks away!) in shady bars and record shops (the pained Vic Chesnutt). Hours were spent going through the shelves at Amoeba Music in California and instead of queuing up for free cones at Ben and Jerry's and bumming like a hippie at Haight and Ashbury, I was scouring for more CDs at Amoeba in San Francisco.

Then the break up happened, and life began down-spinning. Passion for music did not die completely, but gone was the obsessive tracking of albums and news. Music was made secondary, and all I did was purchase new releases by great bands of yester-years. The shelf was beginning to fill up with mediocre music and things that I hardly even listened to. Instead, life was spent listening to bad music at clubs and social interactions were then the order of the day.

And so the story goes, she came into my life. Things became back in order. Spent a whole lot more time at home with her, and the passion for music re-ignited. Shared with her the histories behind the albums I have, pointed her out to the aesthetics of the music, and played a million songs every time we are together.

I love music. Music brings back memories to me. It allows me to live vicariously through it. Good music is not hypocritical. It's in your face and it tells it like it is. Music is the offspring of someone else's passion and somewhat has the ability to create passion in others. Music is contagious. Music shares my feelings. Not explicitly from the words but the feel of the melody and the tone of the singer’s voice. Music brings me out from the dreaded monotonous reality of this world, and puts me in a place where arts, politics and passion are of the highest order.

And yes, don't mistake manufactured music with real music. To hell with Black Eyed Peas, Jennifer Lopez and other major label artistes. Pristine production can never hide your plastic hooks and 'I-wanna-sound-like-a-slut-so-you-will-buy-my-music' lyrics. Stop making music to make money- its like using religion to fuel wars. Hang the DJ at the local radio station.

All in all, I am happy I grew up with good music around me. Cheers to 10 years of real music in my life.

And if you ever want to feel alive and live forever, join me in this world where Jarvis Cocker is not Jesus, but he's got the same initials.

Blame game

2007-09-21T11:21:00.000+08:00

It's much easier to say "You should" than "I could". Point not that finger at me lest you want me to shove it up your ass.

Life or something like it

2007-09-17T00:33:00.001+08:00

Live every day as if it were your last because one of these days, it will be.

2 months

2007-09-15T10:29:00.000+08:00

The dance floor was packed but she is still the center of my universe.

Pain of a less than frequent flyer

2007-09-12T20:55:00.001+08:00

162. That's 98 positions away from the number flashing on the board.
It's 3pm. Why the hell are there so many people on standby for flights to Singapore?

Never mind. Waited.

Next Malaysia airlines - Full.
Next Singapore airlines - Full.
Next Malaysia airlines again.
My turn. Why Malaysia Airlines?
No miles, no blue kebaya smiles.

Aisle seat please? Sorry fully booked, let me put you in a middle seat but up front. OK. Imagined being sandwiched between 2 fat guys. But, hey, what are the chances?

Too little time. 20 minutes to takeoff. Breezed through custom. Got on the aero-train. Got off the aero-train. Gate G02. Where is Gate G02? Shit. G02 is back at the other terminal.

5 minutes more.
Come train, come train, come.
Came and ran out of the train. Reached the gate. Passed through security. Where is the aero bridge? It's probably one of those double storey holding areas. Headed to lift and pressed the button. Not responding. 2 mins. Sorry sir this way. Not the lift smart-ass. There is a bloody elevator to the lower holding area.

Ran ran ran. Whew, not the last. Found my seat. Fat white ass on the right. Shit. At least the left seat is not taken. Half a nightmare.

Looked for a overhead cabin to put my bag. No space. Sorry sir, you need to check that in. No more space in the cabin. Fuck. Check it in. Wanted to shop at Duty Free Singapore. Cannot do that anymore. Need to then pick up my bag from the luggage belt which is after customs. Whatever. Just check it in.

Come, take my bag. Oops, hold on, maybe the passenger on your left can take a seat first. Fat guy. Massive Malay guy. Perspiring alot. Did you know that they give contraptions to people if they cannot fit the safety belt to extend it? I now know. I also know why they need 2 seats on a plane. He took half my seat, while I paid full fare. And sir, why don't you use your towel to wipe your sweat off instead of smearing them all over my Calvin Klein shirt?

Took off and landed safely. Had to induce myself to sleep throughout the flight to get out of this nightmare.

Damn, no DFS shopping. Need to pick up bag from the luggage belt. Ah, I see my bag. Picked up the bag from the belt. Maybe I can still do some shopping at the DFS shop beside the belt, albeit 7% GST imposed now that you are out from customs. Dragged my trolley bag towards the shop. The bag feels funny. It's heavier than this I remembered. Entered the security code to try to open bag to see if anything is missing. The bag does not open.

Shit. Not my bag.

Ran back to the belt. Put the bag back on the belt. 5 minutes later- man turned up with 2 identical bags. Did the unceremonious thing of opening up the bag in public on the floor. Check. OK. Headed out to hopefully luckier times.

Mr. Policeman gave me a big smile pointing the way out to me.

I swear he is gay.

The Development Curve

2007-09-12T10:15:00.000+08:00

It’s been a year since I last came to KL for business.

I no longer recognize all the new account managers in office.
A is no longer a first-day-at-work-gal but full fledged competent finance manager.
L’s stomping presence no longer felt in office, and occasionally reminded of him when I catch glimpses of his petite quiet wife.
R’s shop is no longer in Sunway Pyramid Mall, replaced by an Elle Concept shop.
V’s set of teeth is almost straight and is happily married to a guy that looks younger than me.
M is a single mother of a one year old child.

Even the U turn that was forever in construction is completed and functioning.

And for once, someone I love traveled up from Singapore to brighten up my dull weekend, and I cannot wait to finish work and rush back home to be in her arms.

Things are changing, and I am glad things didn’t stay the same.

Rediscovering time

2007-09-02T11:07:00.000+08:00

Beneath the bed lie 2 boxes that are out of sight and out of mind.

Under the thick layer of dust I rediscovered long lost CDs and box sets. Some of them carefully wrapped, as if I knew knowingly then I was going to chuck them aside and rediscovering them years later.

Field mice, James, Velvet underground, Syd Barrett, Gene and many other gems were again experienced.

Danced and sang boisterously to the new old music that is found, and the music replication, thanks to digital technology, sounds exactly the way I heard it years ago, albeit being played over a set of better speakers now.

Memories were not as clear. Random pieces of events flashed in and out of the head. A clear reminder that the neurosystem is not encoded in bits and bytes. Nostalgia was overwhelming, largely driven by the overall feel.

Cherish what you have now before you forget.

She's the one

2007-08-29T00:33:00.000+08:00

So we experience an epiphany every other day.
Retrospectively how fucked up we have been.
Looking forward with a new design for life.
And yet failing again and again and again and again.

I am not declaring early victory with my new convictions.
6 weeks of absolute bliss and complete devotion.
This is the ultimate epiphany.
Thank God for you.

Teaser

2007-08-17T10:05:00.001+08:00

And yes, I am back for good. Watch this space.

It's the things given, not won

2007-06-12T09:59:00.000+08:00

Day to day
Where do you want to be?'
Cos now you're trying to pick a fight
With everyone you meet
You seem like a soldier
Who's lost his composure
You're wounded and playing a waiting game
In no-man's land no-one's to blame

See the world
Find an old fashioned girl
And when all's been said and done
It's the things that are given, not won
Are the things that you want

Empty handed, surrounded by a senseless scene
With nothing of significance
Besides a shadow of a dream
You sound like an old joke
You're worn-out, a bit broke
An' askin me time and time again
When the answer's still the same

See the world
Find an old fashioned girl
And when all's been said and done
It's the things that are given, not won
Are the things that you want

You've got a chance to put things right
So how's it going to be?
Lay down your arms now
And put us beyond doubt
So reach out it's not too far away
Don't mess around now, don't delay

-'Gomez' See the World

Slept the weekend away

2007-06-10T18:04:00.000+08:00

Last weekend seemed like 3 days away.
This weekend feels like 6 days long.

Idle mind slows down time and prolongs life.
Refreshed.

Mechanical

2007-06-07T11:02:00.000+08:00

It’s one of those mornings where I woke up feeling mechanical. Not happy, not sad, not sorry for myself, not joyous over anything, not passionate about work, not dulled by routine, not worried about the day, not pleased with what I will do in the evening.

Not feeling.

Some people live their lives like that everyday.

I rather feel depressed than not feel at all.

Well, I am wicked and I care

2007-05-27T14:13:00.000+08:00

Oh and yes I am back.
With a vengeance.

A braver new world

2007-05-27T14:10:00.001+08:00

We did not create an Orwellian society.
We stopped it from happening.
We hindered natural selection.
With man made morals and human judgment.
Monogamy is the man-made solution for jealousy.
Insecurity is a manufactured feeling for inferiority.
Faith teaches us that any thing that feels too good is bad for the soul.
Democracy is the representation of the masses of normalcy, subjected to propaganda and manipulation.
Losers win and winners lose.

We are made to be an Orwellian society.
This could have been a braver new world.

You're wicked so please don't care

2007-04-21T17:30:00.000+08:00

Jaques felt himself growing gloomy again.

He was well aware that to live on Earth , a man must follow its fashions and hearts were no longer worn.

Eloisa to Abelard

2007-04-15T16:39:00.000+08:00

How happy is the blameless vestal's lot!
The world forgetting, by the world forgot.
Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd,
Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind.

-Alexander Pope

Don't shove it up my ass

2007-04-11T14:38:00.000+08:00

I need bigger hands to cover my ass. Seems like everyone here has got large, large hands- not only to cover their ass, but also pull the bow so that the arrow goes to someone else.

属于我们的雨天

2007-04-08T21:34:00.000+08:00

Am feeling that Kuala Lumpur is now my second home.
It always rains when I come back to Singapore.

Maybe my heart's found a home.

Free broadband service

2007-04-02T12:51:00.000+08:00

TiSP, incredibly hilarious, and for one moment, I thought I was completely out of touch with technology.

Hope you had a great April Fool's day yesterday, and that the joke was not on you.

The First Big Weekend

2007-03-30T08:57:00.001+08:00

So that was the first big weekend of the summer... Starts Thursday as usual with a canteen quiz and again no-one wins the big cash prize. Later I do my sound bloke routine by approaching Gina's new boyfriend to say that he shouldn't feel that there's any animosity between us and then I even go and make peace with her. I shouldn't have bothered. Then on Friday night we went through to the Arches...There was only one car going, so some of us had to get the train. We got through quite late. Then we went to a pub to take the gear. There was no problems getting in - we saw some others waiting down the front of the queue so we skipped in. It was a good night, everyone was nutted and I ended up dancing with some blonde girl. I thought she had been quite pretty until last night when Matthew informed me that she had, in fact, been a pig. When the club finished we wandered the streets for a while until we got to this 24-hour cafe but I didn't like the look of it so we left and got a taxi back to Morag's flat. I couldn't sleep, so I sat about drinking someone else's strawberry tonic wine and tried to keep everyone else up.Then at ten o'clock in the morning we went downstairs to buy some drink. We had intended to watch the football in the afternoon but we'd passed out by then and slept right through it, awaking to find that England had won two-nil. Then we went to get the train home and had a few in the Station bar. We had some stuff left from the previous night's supplies so when we got home we decided to go down to John's indie disco. Same story as Friday - lots of hugging, lots of dancing etc. etc. I couldn't sleep again so went up the park to look at the tomb, taking a detour through the playpark. To get in we had to climb over a ten foot steel fence, which resulted in severe bruising of our hands, legs and groins, but we had a good laugh on the stuff, especially the tube-slide, which probably doubles up as a urinal for drunk teens. Then we walked through the woods to have a look at the tomb. It was a big disappointment, but the mist on the lake was cool.Sunday afternoon we go up to John's with a lot of beer in time to watch the Simpsons. It was a really good episode about love always ending in tragedy except, of course, for Marge and Homer. It was quite moving at the end and to tell you the truth my eyes were a bit damp. Then we watched these young girls in swimsuits have a water fight in the street. "Taping this, aye?" We went up to the pub about ten. It was busy for a Sunday night, lots of people we know, including my first ever girlfriend who I still find very attractive, quite frankly, but I didn't really speak to her. She's probably still a bitch, anyway. Her friend Gillian was there, I had a chat with her, she was still quite pleasant. At the same time I watched Malcolm make some terrible attempt to try and chat up a girl we know called Jo. He made some remark about her skirt that was barely there the previous night or something. I couldn't sleep again that night, thanks to some seriously disturbing nightmares...Matthew says I should cut down on the cheese."Went out for the weekend, it lasted for ever, high with our friends it's officially summer." I got some sleep eventually on Monday afternoon. It was a beautiful day, and later that evening Malcolm introduced me to the power of Merrydown - £1.79 a litre, 8.2% - mmmm..... Judith and Laura came round later and we sat in my back garden and drank. Then Matthew came round and we went up the town.

It's officially summer.

Thanks to PI, I own the whole 周杰伦's discography

2007-03-30T08:21:00.000+08:00

Parallel imported CDs for SGD7 at Bugis. And our company is complaining that we have issues with PI.

Packing

2007-03-29T18:49:00.000+08:00

Boxing office stuff to move back to Novena Square. Stumbled into memories. Photos, name cards, greeting cards.

If only memories can be put into boxes and re-opened to live through them again.

Jen, if you ever read this, I found some photos of you. Heart-breaking.

The last breath

2007-03-28T22:11:00.000+08:00

Sharp pain in chest today in the gym while running on the treadmill. Thought of death never felt so real, especially after how my parent's friend dropped dead after a gym session recently.

Will I be smiling during my last gasp of air? When will you know that I died? Will you ever know that I am no longer around?

Alex died sad trying to find happiness.

And hopefully the Heavens welcome him with horns, trumpets and dancing angels.

Epidermis

2007-03-28T21:23:00.000+08:00

Manic misunderstood guy. I like the sound of that. And now that people understand, do they still give chances?

Spring/Summer 2002

2007-03-25T10:11:00.000+08:00

Club 21 preview bazaar sale for members. Designer clothes from many seasons ago going for less than a quarter of the price. The clothes don't look bad, it's just not the correct era. The shirts will probably be raved about if it was paraded down the fashion runway 5 years ago.

Just like the shoppers there.

Haute couture, just like physical attractiveness, afterall is a function of taste, space and most importantly time.

Should I still pay a premium for the aesthetics of things?

The mirror tells a sad story.

The other person

2007-03-23T09:48:00.000+08:00

The other person sitting beside me at the food court asked her husband "Is it too spicy?"
I looked across to where I was sitting alone, and wished someone asked the same.

The other person sitting beside me at the hairdresser was reading the magazine that I appeared in. She sniggers when she sees my photograph.
I wished someone was beside me reading the interview and sniggering with me.

The other person spoke to me on the phone last night.
And how I wish she was just by my side talking to me.

He is me

2007-03-21T10:39:00.000+08:00

Just read it. Some books for kids do more things to adults than most books for adults.

Wet weather

2007-03-20T22:14:00.000+08:00

Was it the same grey clouds that brought rain to you and me today?
Maybe one day we will be standing together under the same rain clouds.

Ronald Mcdonald's Driving School

2007-03-20T22:02:00.000+08:00

Innovative driving class today. Suggested to go into Mcdonald's drive thru and use it to practice the S course. I saved paying the circuit fee and gotten my dinner without getting into the rain.

Misery drives creativity.

Moving along

2007-03-20T09:26:00.000+08:00

你说的对, 我应该寻找我应得的关怀和感情, 珍惜我的人.
有一点舍不得, 但可能让你走才是真正的拥有.

希望你找到你知足的快乐.
Don't lose yourself. You could be happy, I know you will.

Buying time

2007-03-19T07:44:00.000+08:00

If you like-like and if you don't just walk away. If you cannot make a decision in a day, then you cannot make a decision at all.

自己骗自己

2007-03-18T23:18:00.001+08:00

明明很在乎.

The Great Big Weekend

2007-03-18T19:15:00.000+08:00

Alive and back from the KL road trip.
Holidays (alone with another guy) cannot be more memorable than this, cos it's marked by:

1 Turning up at the bus station and finding him in almost the same grey V-neck outfit. Oh boy, how gay can we get?
2 Taking a bus there and being caught in the jam that lasted forever and to see an overturned car on the highway. 8 hrs to KL. I could have been in Melbourne with that travelling time.
3 My boss sending me alot of SMSes.
3 Had great Hakka food and fatty pork, and graced by I's lovely presence. And of course her ever so romantic stories.
4 Hanging at Velvet with the most interesting bevy of ladies. I learnt all the synonyms of open trade.
5 Waking up to a guy beside me (albeit in the bed beside me, but nevertheless weird).
6 Shopping! And a Costume National shirt after 30 minutes of deliberation and 6 fittings.
7 Trying on a RM 10,000 watch, and thinking how to own it (through legitimate means).
8 Massaged by a giant lady who thinks that hard is good.
9 Getting the 五月天 compilation.
10 Having very sinful Zan Toi's chocolate banana cake and milk shake and reversing all the running for the past week.
11 Searching for a 'not-so-romantic' ambiance dinner place at Asian Heritage row, so that we don't look too gay. Ended up in an urbane North Indian restaurant, that possibly could make us look gay, but great food anyway.
12 Talked, talked and talked. Learnt more about the world, learnt more about him, learnt more about myself, and learnt more about a Thai girl who possibly could be a working girl.
13 Charmed our way into a club without paying cover charges.
14 Not finishing my gin tonic, which is served in a 350ml glass, but already feeling high.
15 Being seduced on the dance floor by a hot chick with CFM face. You need to see her face to know what it truly means to be CFM. Enraged her bf and was looking for B to come to my rescue but he's no where in sight.
16 Talked, talked and talked again, this time with the cute chicks that smiled at me. I feel attractive!
17 Downed half a glass of Bourbon Coke. In a gulp.
18 Heading back to the hotel with the taxi driver pimping the booties to me. RM 260 for Chinese girls, RM 220 for Malay girls. I told him I wanted to sleep and will only pay his fare to get that.
19 Getting 3 different girls sms-ing me 'I miss you' despite knowing them for approximately 3 hours. Trying to decide if it is me or cos I am a Singaporean (and the unstoppable 2.25 exchange rate).

And possibly most importantly,
20 Rushing back and checking my e mail to see that she has replied to them from Hong Kong.

The never ending story

2007-03-16T19:15:00.000+08:00

8 hrs bus ride to KL. Many calls from office. And a very cheesy movie.
This better be a good weekend.

KL calling

2007-03-16T05:53:00.000+08:00

At the risk of sounding completely lifeless, this is the first holiday that I am taking for close to a year. 3 days with one of my best mate to KL to meet some of my most fun mates.

Poppy Garden, Passion, Zouk, Velvet, Luna Bar, Loft prepare to rock the house. And Abdullah, do put on that smile, cos we are going to spend some serious money to build your country.

And if a holiday still does not get me out of this abject dreariness, I really am not sure when will be the next time I will want to take a break.

Porn star!

2007-03-15T16:22:00.000+08:00

Just been told that someone I dated some time ago is now an accidental amateur porn kitty. That, however, is not what I want to ever be, so no, you will never get to see what's under that towel. Not over the webcam.

What's going on?

2007-03-15T08:03:00.000+08:00

God, I am turning narrative. What is happening to me?

Tilted

2007-03-15T01:00:00.000+08:00

My driving instructor insisted that it is better to be loved than to love. I told him that I want to find someone whom I love and in turn loves me back. He wished me luck, and told me that getting a license will be far easier than that.

The world's not fair. Someone's got to do the heavy lifting.

No description

2007-03-14T22:46:00.000+08:00

And she came in through the MRT doors. Its a surprise to see her. I just bumped into her sister yesterday morning. The usual indifferent conversation popped up, asking her about her day at work and where did she come back from. Said she had dinner with a friend, and pointed to a nondescript guy beside her.

This was 5 mins into the conversation and I did not realise that her friend was standing beside her. Worse, I did not even realise a guy standing beside her.

So poster boy for social ineptness was standing right next to me. Bespectacled, brown shirt, black pants, and a massive bundle of normal-ness. He's not terribly ugly, and he probably might fair better if he was. At least he gets a bit more attention. I said hi to him and NO RESPONSE. NO FUCKING RESPONSE.

And for context, this is the same girl that did not really want to be associated with me. I know her sister for sometime now and we hang out together, and out of being professionally courteous to her one day, I asked her for her number. She said no. She said NO.

So yes. Girls dig nondescript guys like him. Girls do not dig guys that wear Calvin Klein, can pronounce Comme des Garcons, carry tote bags and tap their feet to the iPod beats.

Cause they feel secure with nondescript guys.

The Hollywood truth is that the more nondescript a guy is, the more faithful he is to you.

Someone help me prove the correlation. Someone help save me from this mire.

And so you read my blog

2007-03-13T08:20:00.000+08:00

我想天天和你搭巴士,送你回家, 牵着你的手不放开.
简简单单的爱.

麻坡TURBO超人: No Hip Hop Kaki

2007-03-13T00:58:00.000+08:00

From my indie gal, who's becoming a lil crass. Hilarious anyway.

知足的快乐叫我忍受心痛

2007-03-11T21:16:00.000+08:00

I'll be waiting.

其实你心里有没有我

2007-03-08T17:30:00.000+08:00

我真的不懂.

So what do you get when you fall in love?

2007-03-06T22:42:00.000+08:00

You get to:

Chaperon the girl around
Pay for the girl's meal
Spend countless hours thinking about the girl
Worry about her safety
Wonder where she is all the time
Hoping that she will call
Giving in to her
Hours of heartache and pain
Concealing your tears with laughter

So that you can:

Do the same as above for her for the rest of your life.

Someone explain the value proposition?

Post earthquake reflections

2007-03-06T16:32:00.000+08:00

I did not feel any tremors in the office. My colleague claimed that she felt something. I think it's got something to do with my weight.

The heavy bottomed people in office did not seem to feel anything.

Come back post

2007-03-04T23:19:00.000+08:00

I am available for:

1 Paid sex
2 A proper loving relationship

So I guess life did not move forward since the last post.
Thanks for all the readers that egged me for a comeback.

Life's just too shitty in words.

Discipline

2007-02-13T08:36:00.000+08:00

Set goals and march towards them!

Its funny how our stumbling blocks are inconsequential things like cutting our toe nails. Procrastinate not, time to merge your personal to do list with the work to do list- imagine being paid for following up and closing personal tasks.

Recluse

2007-02-13T08:30:00.000+08:00

Strange days, strange feelings.

Do not:
1 want to blog
2 have people reading my blog
3 monitor how many people read my blog
4 want to be surrounded by familiar people
5 want to talk about the situation I am in
6 wish to be unhappy.

However, recent turn of events.
Endless possibilities.
And this time its literal.

Finally I am going to be more than a finance manager.

Vindictive

2007-01-31T23:41:00.000+08:00

Explode the heart
Load the mind
Evil the soul
Wreck the body

So please do not make me want to destroy you. The misery loves company.

Common sense

2007-01-30T23:13:00.000+08:00

Logic to you is not the same logic to other person. The world is made up of too many people at once.

Privacy

2007-01-30T23:10:00.000+08:00

Taxi drivers should be anonymous people.

好心分手

2007-01-28T03:23:00.000+08:00

Lyrics inclusive. For the next karaoke challenge!

Less than hyper inflation rate

2007-01-26T14:30:00.000+08:00

I have a minuscule pay increase.

To celebrate, I am buying my colleagues Ben and Jerry's so that we can improve Unilever's bottom line. With that, Unilever will have more money to compete against us, and my organization will need (and recognize) my intellectual inputs more to come up with defense strategies against them, and ultimately might decide to pay me more.

Reinvestment into competitors. Fucking awesome.

Lesson from the departing

2007-01-15T09:52:00.000+08:00

Tread not the road of failure.

Dear All,

Now has come the time for me to say a found farewell to everyone.
I am going leave XXX and Singapore. my last day is Today.

I will probably remember some transaction code such as ZSKUJ,ZVSOAV etc.....
but I can not see it help me in the future.

However, all the experiences I shard with you I add to my strength and knowledge.
and I am sure these memories will help me in the future. ;)
I'd like to say big Thank you to you all for the supports you gave me during five and a half years I worked here.

I wish you all happiness and bright fulfilling future.

H. Tanaka

Stupid XXXXX

2007-01-15T00:17:00.000+08:00

Business acumen is not a feeling. Its the in depth understanding of the variety of factors affecting results and logically deciding what to do.

Please don't make a decision cos you feel that is the right thing for the business.

Change of mind

2007-01-15T00:16:00.001+08:00

I think I will prefer to be in a relationship where I love the girl more than the girl loves me.

Critique

2007-01-14T12:45:00.000+08:00

But then, of course, it's always back to the band's meat and potatoes. B-side "The Girl I Loved Before I Fucked" has Moffat go from thinking he can be friends with an ex to wishing abortions and STDs on her in less than a minute. It's songs like this that I imagine led the band to break up, because SUCH DEEP BLEAKNESS JUST ISN'T SUSTAINABLE. BEING SO DOUR AND DIRTY FOR SO LONG MUST BE EXHAUSTING -- you have to put yourself in a certain place mentally to brazenly sing a line like "It was the biggest cock you'd ever seen" over nothing but an acoustic guitar. Anyway, I'm glad Moffat finally found contentment. We'll always have the lousy memories.

-Joe Tangari, January 11, 2007
Excerpt from review of "Ten years of tears", Arab Strap

Dim Sum girl

2007-01-12T07:02:00.000+08:00

I want my Dim Sum girl!

Just because she's dim, she goes out with the ugly guys that can sing in very good Singlish.

I can too! Where's my dim sum girl?

Morning train

2007-01-12T06:42:00.000+08:00

I have a 7 to 4 job. I wake up at 6a.m. to get ready and I finish at 4a.m.

2 hours of sleep, and yes, I do have to make sure that the 2,000 numbers that are needed to be presented to the external party don't have to be oh-so-accurate. Just ensure that the numbers of a million magnitude are rounded up to the nearest ten.

I need to be an athlete.

Your legacy

2007-01-11T07:54:00.000+08:00

I'd settle for an epitaph "He left us with a smile on his face."

But I dun know how to get there

Dull desire

2007-01-11T07:39:00.000+08:00

I wish I could see you again, sit down by the park and share with you how my life has changed.

PAIN

2007-01-11T01:48:00.000+08:00

She was shaking when she found out that the father of her daughter is getting married to someone else.

Emotions.

Misery loves company.

200th post

2007-01-11T01:14:00.000+08:00

Its the 200th post.
11th January.
11.1
1 a.m.

A milestone.
A supposed celebratory entry but that will not fit well.
This blog has come to be a chronicle of pain and pseudo-joy.
Nothing circumstantial, just poor choices made.
I wish I could tear up this blog and have the memories erased with it.

The image of her wet hair being snipped cannot leave my mind.
And its been so long since anyone called me by my Mandarin name.

Is this a milestone?

Male emancipation

2007-01-10T23:34:00.000+08:00

Was told that it was more acceptable for a man to pay for sex than to be paid for sex. And conversely, it is more acceptable for a woman to be paid for sex than to pay for sex.

Shows how attractive the male species is eh?

Murphy's law

2007-01-10T10:56:00.000+08:00

Don't look for ways to spend now when you don't give out gold earlier.

And this is exactly how I feel

2007-01-10T08:05:00.000+08:00

Never felt more fucking stood up.

Stranger than fiction

2007-01-08T23:52:00.000+08:00

The stop which might lead to a start.
The started which might stop.
The stopped which might start.
The started which should stop.
The start that should not start.
The start that is to start.
And the stopped which might stop all starts.
All in a day.

Am just praying for a start that never stops.

12 haircuts

2007-01-08T23:10:00.000+08:00

It's been,

12 haircuts
3 hair dyes
7 eyebrow trimming sessions
2 bosses
2 Comme des Garcons wallets
152 blog entries
2 assignment change
2 laptops
3 mobile phones
270 diet cokes
1 Kio Yamoto glasses
Countless friends
Endless sins
A lonely life

Since I left you. Emptiness cannot feel any hollower than to speak to you today. Regrets can never seem so possible when I walked away. And maybe your life would never be so good if you stayed.

You could be happy. I know you are.

Success measure for stealing someone else's partner

2007-01-06T15:03:00.000+08:00

Hilarious writing from D in Los Angeles' night. Come back soon to do coffee.

1- You're a friend, a forgettable one
2- You're a friend whom I can talk to and keep in touch
3- I WANT to keep in touch and I will text you whenever my bf is away so we can meet up
4- I think about you sometimes and I smile to myself, getting all warm and tingly
5- Sometimes you appear in my mind when me and my bf are bonking and I'm praying I don't yell out your name by mistake
6- I like you enough to go behind my steady's back and pash.
7-8- Let's bonk and see where we go from there.
9- Well... I'm yours to keep.
10- There is no 10.

Romantic song of the moment

2007-01-06T12:38:00.000+08:00

Elope with me Miss Private and we’ll sail around the world
I will be your Ferdinand and you my wayward girl
How many nights of talking in hotel rooms can you take?
How many nights of limping round on pagan holidays?
Oh elope with me in private and we’ll set something ablaze
A trail for the devil to erase

San Francisco’s calling us, the Giants and Mets will play
Piazza, New York catcher, are you straight or are you gay?
We hung about the stadium, we’ve got no place to stay
We hung about the tenderloin and tenderly you tell
About the saddest book you ever read, it always makes you cry
The statue’s crying too and well he may

I love you I’ve a drowning grip on your adoring face
I love you my responsibility has found a place
Beside you and strong warnings in the guise of gentle words
Come wave upon me from the family wider net absurd
“You’ll take care of her, I know it, you will do a better job”
Maybe, but not what she deserves

Elope with me Miss Private and we’ll drink ourselves awake
We’ll taste the coffee houses and award certificates
A privy seal to keep the feel of 1960 style
We’ll comment on the decor and we’ll help the passer by
And at dusk when work is over we’ll continue the debate
In a borrowed bedroom virginal and spare

The catcher hits for .318 and catches every day
The pitcher puts religion first and rests on holidays
He goes into cathedrals and lies prostrate on the floor
He knows the drink affects his speed he’s praying for a doorway
Back into the life he wants and the confession of the bench
Life outside the diamond is a wrench

I wish that you were here with me to pass the dull weekend
I know it wouldn’t come to love, my heroine pretend
A lady stepping from the songs we love until this day
You’d settle for an epitaph like “Walk Away, Renee”
The sun upon the roof in winter will draw you out like a flower
Meet you at the statue in an hour
Meet you at the statue in an hour

-"Piazza, New York Catcher" Belle and Sebastian